Posted on 06-07-2011
Filed Under (Complaints) by Steve

I hate laminate flooring!

I used to love it; I love that modern clean look it gives, the fact that there is not an essence of dirt on it, and the fact that it smells better than carpet.

I loved the fact that friends would come to the house and admire not just the house and layout but also look at the fresh impact of wood/laminate over carpet,

But I hate it now.

The dirt doesn’t stick to it (and by dirt I mean hair (Pip’s / the cats)). I know what you are thinking, better to have the dirt where its easiest to pick-up than having it embedded in the carpets for weeks WELL I DISAGREE WITH YOU!!

Get yourself a good vacuum – we have been using a Vax for a while, yes its worn but it could still cope with 2 dogs and three cats and Pip, we were planning on getting a Dyson for an even bigger impact and even better cleanliness. We could get away with hoovering twice weekly and cleaning the carpets (using a RugDoctor) twice yearly – sounds like a lot of work I hear you say, well yes, it is but, no-where near as much work as with bloody laminate all over the sodding house (oh and we are renting btw 2 weeks into a 52 week contract so no changes there).

The dirt and hair gets EVERYWHERE! To keep it clean you must clean it daily and by this I mean using either the hoover on its highest brush setting (lest you want the dirt thrown across the room and not up the pipe) or manually with a dust-pan and brush, then you need to mop it; and lets not forget the 30-minute effect the same as that at uni:

I like washing-up, always have, I find it very therapeutic, a chance to unwind and think whilst my hands and eyes do something repetitive and monotonous – I wash-up with my finger-tips so that I can feel the dirt even when it is not visible; its for these reasons that I refuse to get a dishwasher (and the added cost, and that to be economical the dishwasher may only be used twice per day when to wash-up a plate, knife, fork & cup could be done in only half a bowl – I digress); anyway, so there I would be working my way through I mountain of washing-up, I would have finished it, stand back to look at my now clean a sparkly kitchen when one of my housemates would come along and drop more stuff for washing even when they would know I was doing the washing – how infuriating is that??!

Which brings me firmly back to cleaning laminate over carpet, when cleaning carpet and someone drops dirt over it, you are most likely not going to notice and true the dirt could become entangled in the fibres but following a twice-yearly carpet cleaning regime will ensure a healthy carpet; now compare this to laminate; you’ve just spent an hour vacuuming and mopping the floor when someone inadvertently molts some of there hair over it, not only will you have a now messy floor but you’ll have a bloody hard time trying to clean it as the hair will not stick to the floor like it would carpet.

I hate laminate flooring!

(0) Comments   
Posted on 29-06-2011

Just to set the record straight as it seems as though I have earned a name for myself.

Its not that I dislike Nando’s, rather I just cannot see the point.

Everyone bangs on about it as though its the greatest thing since sliced bread but I just cannot see the point – its just chicken served at hugely over-inflated prices!

If you really want to ‘dine-out’ on chicken, maybe consider the cheaper alternative of KFC but who in their right mind would spend £39.95 on two whole chickens and 5 sides (chips, spicy rice, coleslaw, corn on the cob, garlic bread, peas or mash).1 Taking a trip to Tesco (or your favourite  supermarket) and you could get that lost for considerably cheaper (at least 50%) and you would still have enough for your own seasonings/marinades and some alcohol.

So to re-iterate, its not that I don’t like it, I just won’t pay through the nose for something that I can do better (and cheaper) myself.

  1. Nandos menu visited 05/07/2011
(0) Comments   

They’re just animals.

And they are only required to serve just one purpose.

What is the ultimate present you can buy your seven year old that shall truly trump all others?
Something they can love, feed and be with.

Something that as soon as they find something far more exciting to do like play the latest PS3 game they can just throw away; something that as soon as you decide that you no longer want or care about so can take to be euthanised?

Thats right, a cat or a dog.

I find it hard to believe or understand that even in these times that people are still taking the family pet – a living breathing person to be destroyed when they can no longer be bothered with them. How wicked can you get.

Just last night a friend of ours that works for one of the pet rescue charities told us that her vets refuse to euthanise in favour of contacting the rescue centre to arrange for an alternative home.

One of my colleagues once remarked to another when her dog was ‘misbehaving’ [by misbehaving I mean he was chewing through everything out of boredom as the 'owner' in question was far too lazy to walk him and would not give him any affection] that as he would not ‘play ball’ that they should “put him down” as “that is exactly what I would do”.

And then there’s the fact people are allowed time off to care for a sick family member but any hint of needing to care for the family pet results in illegal disciplinary proceedings – Do company’s not know about the clauses set-out in the Animal Welfare Act 2006?

What is it that causes people to think and act in such an irrational and destructive manner?

They’re just animals.

(0) Comments   
Posted on 17-03-2011

Before I start, let me point out that with brown skin, I too am from an ethnic minority.

What is the problem with having a pure white/Caucasian cast to represent Midsomer Murders?

I absolutely love the programme and I have to say that I am very sorry to see that Det. Chief Inspector Barnaby has now taken an indefinite holiday the only thing I say here is “You now have no escape from Mrs Barnaby’s meals Sir!”
But to see that Brian True-May has now been suspended pending an investigation into the exclusion of ethnic minorities in the programme is plain ludicrous!

I am from an ethnic minority and I too live in a similar village to many of those represented in Midsomer and there have been occasions when I too have been the ‘only brownie in the village’ – does this make me resent MM? No! I thoroughly enjoy the quintessential ‘typically English’ village as seen in Midsomer, its what makes many of the murders enjoyable, to see that people would go to such extraordinary lengths over nonsense.

How many people would honestly kill because the neighbours house doesn’t fit with the rest of the rustic aesthetic, or because they couldn’t act? There must be something in it or these plot lines would not have been used in the recent comedy Hot Fuzz1 ; and besides, it is nice to detract from the more serious plot lines that we see in Silent Witness and Waking the Dead, both of which deal with more contentious issues (both of which I thoroughly enjoy).

Midsomer Murders caters for a certain demographic which given the continual viewing figures and long running success would demonstrate that the current formula works; changes to the programme could harm the current demographic which could lead to a demise of the programme and besides, where would you put the minority?

Now they would have to be coloured; as there has been white minority groups in previous episodes such as Series 2 Ep 1. “Stranglers Wood”2; but with such small villages where the story only usually includes no more than 4 families / suspects, to ensure that they are seen, they would have to become one of the groups which means that at some point, they would either have to die for which there would be an uproar and possible complaints such as “they only died because they were an ethnic minority”, or, they would have to be the offender for which there would be an uproar and possible complaints such as “they were only portrayed as the offender because they were an ethnic minority”!

Either way, the programme will not survive and once you change the formula, you cannot revert back to the old ways.

All I can say is – Well Done Midsomer Murders, at 14 years and over 220 murders 3 you’ve had a good run but I now believe that your days are numbered!


  1. Simon Pegg / Nick Frost Hot Fuzz 2007
  2. Portugese (Anna Santarosa) & Brazillian (Carla Constanza)
  3. Which actually only equates to 16 murders per year across the whole county – not bad btw
(0) Comments   

Just read this article on BBC News: Christmas drivers offered ‘free’ soft drink

I don’t understand why drivers continue to drink at Christmas or at any time.

I like to have a drink, I enjoy driving but what I do not understand is those who really do not know their limits and then get behind the wheel – drunk in charge should hold a greater impact.

Surely then maybe we could follow the line of duty of care to the extent that should a publican be aware that the drinker is about to drive having had too much then he has a duty to prevent the act by confiscating the drivers keys or face prosecution for knowingly allowing the act to be committed.

As history has taught us, people cannot be trusted; they get into a group and suddenly 1 drink becomes five, they are now over the limit and worse could endanger their lives or others so instead of cleaning them for everything they have as you fill your coffers maybe, instead of wasting Police time in stopping the drunk, and instead of allowing them to knowingly ruin their lives, perhaps the publican should act responsibly: confiscate the keys and arrange for a taxi and then not return the keys for at least 24 hours,[1.It actually takes a minimum of 48 hours for the alcohol to be completely removed from the body] providing they have not been drinking in your establishment and they no longer appear drunk.

At least then you can say that you are a responsible landlord.

(0) Comments    Read More